The inevitable has presented itself. H will probably begin her transition to be with her family. Transitioning in foster care is really hard because 99% of the time the children are released into homes that are "better" than where they came from, but not as good as the foster home. I feel really sad, although I am trying not to think about it. My strategy in dealing with pain in life is to disconnect. I have done this a few times over the past few motnhs. I have been seeing a counselor from our church who is also my friend and we talked about my disconnecting is a sin. Tough. It's true though. I signed up to love the unloved and I am required in my commitment to the children to love them and stay connected. This will be the hardest part of transitioning... staying connected to a child I will know nothing of in 6 months. However, she deserves the best.
So this transition will take a few months, but my goal is to have her gone before we leave for Spain. I desire this selfishly and unselfishly. Selfishly I will be able to detox in Spain for 3 weeks.... I can disconnect! Unselfishly if we leave for 3 weeks H will go into an unknown home come back to us for about a week or 2 and then move on. Yeah, not the greatest for her.
I would like us all to pray. Pray that God's hand will walk with her during life and that He will call her into His kingdom by name. That she may know Him. Pray that I survive this. :) Not only that I "survive", but that if it is God's desire for us to take in another precious unloved child that we will. I see this as a calling for our life, but it is the most difficult thing I have ever done. God is amazing. He puts these amazing desires in our hearts...yet they are the most difficult of all things.
Thank you for all your continuous love and support.
pray.
6 comments:
hey chica. i don't know if this is legal where you are, but a lot of foster families in Illinois stay in touch with the children they foster after they've moved on. (i hear) for children that have so much transition in their lives, maintaining connections really helps them develop permanency and stability--so maybe you can get to know the new family? still have her over for visits and such? make sure she has pictures of you and of her time with you? i guess the idea is that foster children, even more than other children, need the sense of history, of where they came from. this might be difficult...
o also, i would love those yoga videos--maybe i can get them from you when i come for easter...
I will pray for you. and for H. and for the family she's going to.
i will be praying for you adrienne, and i will miss h alot.
I will pray for you guys diligently every single day with all my heart.
We do know the family where she is going and we have been having visits with them. We will continue to have visits and we plan to allow one of the children to stay the night and try to teach her how to love her sister without doing everything for her. It will be a slow transition, but hopefully we can help them see what H needs best in terms of discipline and consistency.
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