I love this song! It really puts me in my place. We used to sing it at The Village. You can listen to it on the link provided. It's rough and uncut.
http://www.villagersonline.com/users/eric/music/The%20Deep%202007/
The Deep
Trust the Lord with all your heart
lean not on your own understanding
In all your ways acknowledge him
and he will make your path straight
He’ll make your path straight
I acknowledge you are my savior Jesus
I acknowledge you are my lord
I trust you with my shovel
Knee deep in manure
Do not resent his rebuke
But what He knows he divides the deep
Divide the deep
He put the stars in their place
Laid the ground on which we stand
On which we stand
I acknowledge that you’re holy
I acknowledge you as king
I trust you eating gravel
And I will remain faithful
9.30.2007
9.26.2007
a prayer request/share your thoughts
As you all know, David and I love to travel and experience new countries. Recently we have been thinking about an amazing opportunity in the summer. We would like to experience Africa, and if given the option, Rwanda. We have been wanting to experience Rwanda for a few years. David would like to volunteer in a hospital and I would like to volunteer in an orphanage.
We could possibly go with World Vision or the Free Methodist Church...both present different obstacles. Next summer is the only summer David gets a break, so we would like to go for a month. We want to experience Africa on this short trip to perhaps prepare for life there.
If you could begin praying for us we would really appreciate it.
We could possibly go with World Vision or the Free Methodist Church...both present different obstacles. Next summer is the only summer David gets a break, so we would like to go for a month. We want to experience Africa on this short trip to perhaps prepare for life there.
If you could begin praying for us we would really appreciate it.
9.25.2007
a great weekend with my mom
David and I had a fabulous weekend with my mom here. We ate at some excellent restaurants including Palios, El Sabor Latino, Habana Cafe, and a small restaurant in Ontario, Canada. Yummy!!!!
Here are some pics of our great time.
on our way to dinner after my mom arrive!
Palios has the most amazingly delicious food!
eating at el sabor latino
David and Uncle Dave at the Cuban restaurant
Ginger had us over for dinner and we celebrated my birthday!
My beautiful mom
I took my mom to the motown museum, but it was closed. :(
We are such a pair, aren't we???
Here are some pics of our great time.
on our way to dinner after my mom arrive!
Palios has the most amazingly delicious food!
eating at el sabor latino
David and Uncle Dave at the Cuban restaurant
Ginger had us over for dinner and we celebrated my birthday!
My beautiful mom
I took my mom to the motown museum, but it was closed. :(
We are such a pair, aren't we???
9.19.2007
In our weakness we are found
So I read the book we are going to use in our study with the young girls yesterday. It's small book with 9 chapters...all dealing with image. As I was reading the book I realized most of the truths that I underlined and thought about are truths that I still don't believe. I have struggled with image since I was probably 10. I have never felt pretty or thin...in fact, I found a journal yesterday dating 2002 with my raw feelings of ugilness and feeling fat. I read it to David and then I said, "I haven't changed at all in 5 years. " Most of my journals are filled with my deep longing for the voices in my head to go away. I had eating disorders...the whole bit. And so here I am still dealing with this weight of burdens and I am supposed to walk young girls through their journeys of beauty.
So I am going to have the girls make collages...one side being what God says about beauty and one side what the world says. I made an example yesterday.
With my struggle with image there are certain choices I have to make to keep myself from falling back into the disorders...I don't read magazines and I hide the mirrors. We don't have a scale. Well, to make the collage I bought ONE magazine. A fitness magazine... Women's Health. It was brutal making the collage. The world bombards us with images and quotes to makes us feel insignificant. The author highlights the necessity of make-up, hair products, and advertisements gives us a message: YOU AREN'T GOOD ENOUGH. How many tears have I shed and how many boyfriends did I have and how many diets have I tried and how much money have I spent all because the advertisements worked...they made me feel not good enough. I have spent 15 years trying to FEEL thin and beautiful. And I am still not there.
The voices of culture, friends, and family aren't going to go away. It's a CHOICE to believe true things about beauty.
The whole thing must be so heartbreaking for God. He created us so carefully and so purposefully and yet we refuse to believe we are beautiful and have value. I don't know very many women who don't struggle with their image. I cringe thinking of the devil sitting smiling at how he has twisted our thinking.
Thankfully God only asks us of what we can do. So He must believe in me. :) And I think he is bringing me to a place where I will see the pain the girls feel in their attempts to fit in and feel accepted. Walking through pain with others is a very intense experience and it will hopefully bring me to a place of confession and repentance. I have confessed, but I have yet to honestly repent.
Jesus is so awesome because He wants us whole and he wants to use us in His great plan. And He slowly works through the rough spots to shine us up with His GLORY.
May we all work through our weaknesses.
So I am going to have the girls make collages...one side being what God says about beauty and one side what the world says. I made an example yesterday.
With my struggle with image there are certain choices I have to make to keep myself from falling back into the disorders...I don't read magazines and I hide the mirrors. We don't have a scale. Well, to make the collage I bought ONE magazine. A fitness magazine... Women's Health. It was brutal making the collage. The world bombards us with images and quotes to makes us feel insignificant. The author highlights the necessity of make-up, hair products, and advertisements gives us a message: YOU AREN'T GOOD ENOUGH. How many tears have I shed and how many boyfriends did I have and how many diets have I tried and how much money have I spent all because the advertisements worked...they made me feel not good enough. I have spent 15 years trying to FEEL thin and beautiful. And I am still not there.
The voices of culture, friends, and family aren't going to go away. It's a CHOICE to believe true things about beauty.
The whole thing must be so heartbreaking for God. He created us so carefully and so purposefully and yet we refuse to believe we are beautiful and have value. I don't know very many women who don't struggle with their image. I cringe thinking of the devil sitting smiling at how he has twisted our thinking.
Thankfully God only asks us of what we can do. So He must believe in me. :) And I think he is bringing me to a place where I will see the pain the girls feel in their attempts to fit in and feel accepted. Walking through pain with others is a very intense experience and it will hopefully bring me to a place of confession and repentance. I have confessed, but I have yet to honestly repent.
Jesus is so awesome because He wants us whole and he wants to use us in His great plan. And He slowly works through the rough spots to shine us up with His GLORY.
May we all work through our weaknesses.
9.15.2007
an update
We put on shoes, socks, pants, shirts, and sweaters to embrace the cool weather. My cheeks are still rosy from our morning walk. We walked on a lovely path through tall trees whose leaves are beginning to change. My hands are still warming up...I think it's time to buy mittens.
Step into Africa is happening at our church this week. It's a World Vision experience to bring awareness to the AIDS pandemic in Africa. Yesterday I was at the church for several hours in the morning, and then went to a women's tea to hear about the effects of the virus on women and then volunteered at the experience in the evening. There are four children represented in the exhibit. You see photos of their homes, their families...their lives. You are stamped in the clinic with the result of your AIDS test. My hand still bears a red circle with a red plus in the middle. I have walked through the lives of two children...Babiyre and Emmanuel...a girl and a boy...both incidentally from Uganda. The experience is quite moving. There are many things about the AIDS crisis that I was unaware of...including the effects of poverty and how that accelerates the disease much quicker than in the US. I am learning a lot about World Vision...including their devotion to the lives of children...right in line with my calling. :) I find the non profit organization to be quite wonderful, despite my previous thoughts.
David and I plan to have a low key morning... I need to clean this pig pen of a home and he will study then we will reunite and go downtown to the Saturday Market and buy fresh fruits and vegetables for the week. This afternoon I work with one of the elderly women, and then at the restaurant. David will be going to watch the Florida/Tennesse football game at the youth pastor's home. I am bummed I can't go!
This week youth group starts and I will be working with frosh/sophomore girls. The chosen study is a book called Designed By God by Regina Franklin. I think it should bring up some important topics about image. Please pray for my time with the girls as I look to build relationships.
So that's the update.
Step into Africa is happening at our church this week. It's a World Vision experience to bring awareness to the AIDS pandemic in Africa. Yesterday I was at the church for several hours in the morning, and then went to a women's tea to hear about the effects of the virus on women and then volunteered at the experience in the evening. There are four children represented in the exhibit. You see photos of their homes, their families...their lives. You are stamped in the clinic with the result of your AIDS test. My hand still bears a red circle with a red plus in the middle. I have walked through the lives of two children...Babiyre and Emmanuel...a girl and a boy...both incidentally from Uganda. The experience is quite moving. There are many things about the AIDS crisis that I was unaware of...including the effects of poverty and how that accelerates the disease much quicker than in the US. I am learning a lot about World Vision...including their devotion to the lives of children...right in line with my calling. :) I find the non profit organization to be quite wonderful, despite my previous thoughts.
David and I plan to have a low key morning... I need to clean this pig pen of a home and he will study then we will reunite and go downtown to the Saturday Market and buy fresh fruits and vegetables for the week. This afternoon I work with one of the elderly women, and then at the restaurant. David will be going to watch the Florida/Tennesse football game at the youth pastor's home. I am bummed I can't go!
This week youth group starts and I will be working with frosh/sophomore girls. The chosen study is a book called Designed By God by Regina Franklin. I think it should bring up some important topics about image. Please pray for my time with the girls as I look to build relationships.
So that's the update.
9.10.2007
a thought
We were asked to pray for someone's wife yesterday. She had an appointment today with the doctor. Reason unknown. We were told, "It could be bad." (Whatever that means.) The husband emailed a group of us this morning with an update that everything is fine. "God is good."
Does that mean that God is bad if the results had been negative?
Does that mean that God is bad if the results had been negative?
taking care of the elderly
I finally found the courage to ask how her husband died. Was he sick or did it happen suddenly? The story she told me opened up my heart for the elderly and how they, like children, need people to fight for them and help them.
She woke up to find him sick. She didn't think much of it and began to clean up the mess. She soon realized she needed to call 911. The paramedics came and took him to the hospital. She didn't have her shoes and socks on so she didn't go in the ambulance. (This alone is saddening. How much would it have taken for a medic to help her with her shoes and socks to be with her husband.) She arrived at the hospital and no one could tell her where he was. She didn't know where to sit or what to do because no one would give her any answers...so she drove home. When she arrived back, the director heard her story and called the hospital to find out where he was. She deserved to be with her husband. The hospital told the director to send the woman back...accompanied by a family member.
It never occurred to her that he might die. He had had heart surgeries and worse symptoms and always came through. If only she had been there to tell the medics they shouldn't use the defibulator...or to tell them his history. She thinks about this day at night when she's falling asleep. If only she could have been there when he left this world.
I have been raised to fight for what I want. I don't go home and wonder where my husband is, I demand to see him.
There comes a point when we can't fight anymore. Where time passes slowly and everyday tasks take an immense amount of time to accomplish.
My experiences working with the elderly are awakening another part of my compassionate heart that hadn't been touched before.
We need to take better care of our elderly.
She woke up to find him sick. She didn't think much of it and began to clean up the mess. She soon realized she needed to call 911. The paramedics came and took him to the hospital. She didn't have her shoes and socks on so she didn't go in the ambulance. (This alone is saddening. How much would it have taken for a medic to help her with her shoes and socks to be with her husband.) She arrived at the hospital and no one could tell her where he was. She didn't know where to sit or what to do because no one would give her any answers...so she drove home. When she arrived back, the director heard her story and called the hospital to find out where he was. She deserved to be with her husband. The hospital told the director to send the woman back...accompanied by a family member.
It never occurred to her that he might die. He had had heart surgeries and worse symptoms and always came through. If only she had been there to tell the medics they shouldn't use the defibulator...or to tell them his history. She thinks about this day at night when she's falling asleep. If only she could have been there when he left this world.
I have been raised to fight for what I want. I don't go home and wonder where my husband is, I demand to see him.
There comes a point when we can't fight anymore. Where time passes slowly and everyday tasks take an immense amount of time to accomplish.
My experiences working with the elderly are awakening another part of my compassionate heart that hadn't been touched before.
We need to take better care of our elderly.
9.05.2007
A Book Review: El Zahir
Yes, my first book review ever! First, this book was amazing. I really liked it. There was a section that I found thought provoking.
"To begin there was a city wall. The wall remained, but part of it was used to build a chapel. Many years passed, and teh chapel became a church. Another century passed, and the church became a Gothic cathedral. The cathedral had had its moments of glory, there had been structural problems, for a time it had been abandoned, and then restoration work had distorted the whole shape of the building, but each generation thought it solved the problem and would rework the original plans. Thus, in teh centuries that followed, they raised a wall here, took down a beam there, added a buttress over there, created or bricked up stained glass windows.
And the cathedral withstood it all.
I walk through the skeleton of the cathedral, studying the restoration work curently being carried out: this time the architects guarantee that they have found the perfect solution. Everwhere there are metal supports, scaffolding, grand theories about what to do next, and some criticism abou waht was done in the past.
And suddently, in the middle of the central nave, I realize something very important: the cathedral is me, it is all of us. We are all growing and changing shape, we notice certain weaknesses that need to be corrected, we don't always choose the best solution, but we carry on regardless, trying to remain upright and decent, in order to do honor not to the walls or the doors or the windows, but to the empty space inside, and where we worship and venerate what is dearest and most important to us."
I guess that isn't really a review...more of a quote... anyway
"To begin there was a city wall. The wall remained, but part of it was used to build a chapel. Many years passed, and teh chapel became a church. Another century passed, and the church became a Gothic cathedral. The cathedral had had its moments of glory, there had been structural problems, for a time it had been abandoned, and then restoration work had distorted the whole shape of the building, but each generation thought it solved the problem and would rework the original plans. Thus, in teh centuries that followed, they raised a wall here, took down a beam there, added a buttress over there, created or bricked up stained glass windows.
And the cathedral withstood it all.
I walk through the skeleton of the cathedral, studying the restoration work curently being carried out: this time the architects guarantee that they have found the perfect solution. Everwhere there are metal supports, scaffolding, grand theories about what to do next, and some criticism abou waht was done in the past.
And suddently, in the middle of the central nave, I realize something very important: the cathedral is me, it is all of us. We are all growing and changing shape, we notice certain weaknesses that need to be corrected, we don't always choose the best solution, but we carry on regardless, trying to remain upright and decent, in order to do honor not to the walls or the doors or the windows, but to the empty space inside, and where we worship and venerate what is dearest and most important to us."
I guess that isn't really a review...more of a quote... anyway
9.03.2007
A Great Weekend
What a lovely weekend at the cottage! I was able to wake up one morning at 6:30 to take a picture of the kayak as the sun was rising. (Then I went back to bed!!!) I also dropped a ski and am learning on one now. HURRAY!!! I am trying to follow in the steps of the pros as seen in the pics above!
And the moon was a magnificent bright orange on Saturday night.
I admit settling back into life is a bummer deal. I like the tranquility and peace of the cottage. Coming home to laundry, cleaning, and reality... bites!
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