the return to cloth diapers

As many of you know I faithfully used cloth diapers with Bentley until he was about 17 months and then again with Clayton until he was about 7 months. There are a lot of benefits to cloth diapers. 1. They are cost effective 2. They are much better for the environment 3. They are the "thing to do" now 4. They can be really cute! There are a lot of reasons why people don't use them 1. They create a lot of laundry 2. You end up dealing with a lot more p**p than if using disposables 3. They are inconvenient- bigger diaper bag, more diaper changes, more time consuming

So I took a break for about 18 months and I have been buying disposables. When Clayton was born I was dunking one of Bentley's soiled diaper in the toilet- Clayton was screaming and Bentley was getting into the toilet paper and I just needed to stop. Well, recently I was writing to a friend the benefits of cloth and the most cost effective route to take when I saw that they have this thing that I call a booty sprayer. It allows you to spray down the diaper instead of the traditional dunking! So this got me thinking it might be a good idea to pick up my cloth diapers again. I also have been thinking about potty training and I hear cloth diapering can encourage potty training because the kids don't like to feel the wetness and begin to understand why we use the toilet. Finally, a side comment about how our trash isn't so bad- and that more than half of it was diapers.... I couldn't believe I was causing so much trash! When using disposables I don't change them super often because they do hold a lot of pee without causing a rash.... feel bad for my kids!
So while we were in Portland, I bought the booty sprayer and snappi clips to come home and get started. And yesterday was a success! We made it through the day! I feel very excited.
Also, after dinner Bentley was in his chair and stood up and started grabbing at his pants and whining so I picked him up quickly, told him to "hold it", threw his clothes off throughout the living room and plopped him on the potty- it was a little late for the pee, but the kid p**ped in the toilet!! I couldn't believe it! I am so excited. I hope that he is starting to get this potty training thing. :) I am on a slow progressive route with him rather than the more aggressive potty train in a day idea. I do ask for you to pray for me in the arena of patience as I learn how to communicate potty training. I really don't want to get angry when he doesn't tell me he has to go.

So encourage us in this new endeavor!!


A note to anyone who is interested in cloth diapering:


There are a lot of different options out there in terms of cloth diapers. Many places that sell the different diapers will give you a diaper seminar to learn all the different options.

We choose the cheapest route. We do the classic prefolds with covers.
Initially we only had the proraps. They are the cheapest and most plain. The only bummer is that you have to buy the different sizes, so it actually might not be the cheapest.
I recommend the thirsties duo wrap. You only have to get 2 sizes and they come in cute patterns and covers.


If I had more money and I could do whatever I wanted I would do the bumgenius all in one diaper.


Hope that helps!

this is what I deal with, seriously!

I was trying to get a picture of myself to put on facebook since everyone like looks a pregnant belly... but my husband kept interrupting my photo session!

lately

I haven't put up pictures from Bentley's third birthday and our trip to Arizona.... so I guess I better do that!







Helping Daddy in the yard!




At Grandpa and Grandma's house.... getting ready to blow out the candles!


So proud of himself!!!






At the zoo a visit from the Peacock was a highlight!




Clayton loves the zoo!




with Auntie Caroline!



with Uncle Mark!




Bentley in his beloved RAIN BOOTS!


Clayton!


Bentley and friend, Austin. My college roomate, Sarah's older son.


Bentley and Me!

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Bentley and Clayton on Bentley's birthday!



Chris playing with the boys!

into the wild and thoughts on denial

So today I watched this movie called Into the Wild and I really liked it. If you haven't seen it and want to without knowing the ending... don't read this post. :) Although I saw it after I knew the ending and I still enjoyed it.

So the movie has a lot of negative criticism because the main character denies society by going "into the wild" of Alaska without a map and ends up dying because he eats a potato root which is very poisonous. Many see the journey to Alaska as a death sentence and don't think he should be viewed in such a heroic light. In my opinion, he did what he did and it sucks that he dies, but I still think the internal struggles that are portrayed are worth examining and writing about. So I am going to do just that.

The thing that really got me thinking about posting a blog was a song that's in the movie called Society. (I will add the Youtube video with lyrics at the end of this post!) The song talks about how society is so greedy and how we won't be really freed until we have it all... like we live in this state of always wanting more and so the peace of not wanting more never arrives. Later in the song there is a powerful section that talks about how wanting less isn't necessarily the answer because your whole set of values is still based on stuff... just having less of it. The song doesn't lead you to an answer of where you should put your focus or attention... but that it definitely shouldn't be on having stuff.
So now that you all get the foundation of my post I can actually articulate my thoughts!

So the movie is based on a true story about a kid who appears to have sincerely struggled with society and the desire to get more and have more. It appears that he lives a simple life managing to save $26,000 through college which he gives to a charity before he goes on his adventure. Before he goes to Alaska, he goes on a 2 year trek around the United States and into Mexico on a voyage to vanish off the map. Many reviews that I read about the movie are people wishing to do that- sell everything they have and go be hippies on the open road.

Before I continue my thoughts I am going to add a story that will help you all understand my story a bit more. :)

So this movie reminded me a lot of my dad who is probably the closest person I know that really is a hippie. When he was 25 he and 3 buddies rode their bicycles (before they had mountain bikes!) from downtown Detroit to La Paz, Bolivia. It took them a year. Around the same time period he also taught English in Taiwan, climbed a bunch of mountains, and started a bike ride that still exists today in California called Sea to Summit. This past year he has ridden over 10,000 miles on his bike throughout the country. I love hearing his stories and it's kind of fun that my dad loves the freedom of the open road. But I also know that it is not a life that is to be romanticized. It's pouring down rain, wet and cold; 100% humidity in 100 degree weather; it's hurrying to the finish before the hurricane gets there; it's loving sleeping on picnic tables; and sometimes really lonely.

So I just want to say that I am proud of my dad for having his adventures and being one who has continually tried to deny society in his own way.... but I also want to offer another way to have the same thoughtful framework without having to deny it all for the open road.

As a Christian, the idea of denying self is pivotal to my faith and signifies my allegiance to Christ. Obviously I fail miserably every day, but desire to keep working at it. One of the greatest things that I long to deny is stuff. As I mentioned earlier, having or not having stuff is insignificant- it's the foundation behind the desire. I must ask myself: why do I want this? What void is it filling?

My desire is to be all consumed with Christ and not desire anything outside Him. When we are consumed with Christ we are able to cast off all the falsities of this life- we are able to find ourselves in Him- knowing that we are walking in light of salvation and working as agents of recreation. In other words, my denial of stuff is a recognition that those things won't fill my voids and won't make me happy. And also that by not spending money on those things I can give more money to aid organizations or churches or people who are in need.

When I think of the movie I can't help but connect the idea of going "into the wild" as a state of mind rather than ditching it all and going to Alaska. Staying in Detroit and choosing to connect with the poor and the struggles here is kind of like my "wild". It's my rejection of society and the American dream. It's my clinging to Christ and the life that I see Him leading our family into. As the main character meets lots of people on his rode journeys- so I long to meet people here and share stories... and most importantly, the love of Christ.

Admittedly, our trip to Africa this year was an attempt to try and go off the grid and deny the desired life.... and seriously it was the most difficult adventure of my life. But I still see the possibility of us returning to Kibuye to continue the work there...both in the hospital and in the church. But even if we never get the chance to return, I know that I don't have to go finding adventure because we are in it... now.

Anyway, I really liked the movie. It made me think a lot about wanting to deny the things that are filling voids... but only because they draw me closer to Christ and not because I want to be a hippie. (That's my struggle!)

So watch the movie and see what you think. And to all my Christian readers out there... let's help one another continue to walk into the life of righteousness.... "Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:14

on a little boy with glasses

1.

Bentley graduated from the Early Intervention Program this past spring and was promoted to be part of an ECDD (Early Childhood Developmental Disabilities) classroom. There was a misunderstanding when we did the exit interview in June. I thought they were going to place him in a classroom, but they thought I wanted to put him in a Head Start and not do an ECCDD classroom. So I have been making some calls, but no one knew if he was placed or where, so finally on Monday I went downtown to take to the Special Education department at DPS.... turns out he wasn't placed. The school I wanted him in is less than a mile from our house, but it is full. So they placed him at Outer Drive and Gratiot which is like 5 mi. away and takes 10 min. at least. It is also well located in the Hood. Yes, we live in the Hood, but I know this place and I feel comfortable here... I don't know that area of town.
When I left the building I felt so discouraged. I called the teacher at the school where I want him and she will let me know if a child doesn't show up within 20 days and maybe Bentley can have that spot.
David and I have been very outspoken about our desire to send the boys to the public school because we believe it is a valuable way to be part of transformation and change in this community. I was really looking forward to getting my foot in the door and meeting more families in this community in a setting that is equal- we both are sending our kids to a school- and not me handing out a backpack or a flier- or trying to get to know a person without having anything in common.
We have been praying for God's wisdom in where to send Bentley to preschool for several months. It has been a very long and painful process for me. Don't we all long to send our children to the best schools with the best teachers so that we can help them be the best? Well, I am faced with that in my 3 year old. Research shows that what we do NOW will echo greatly into his future. Well, right now we live in one of the poorest cities with one of the worst educational systems... so what am I supposed to do with that? Trust in the Lord. I hear the quiet voice of the Holy Spirit... Cast all your fears on Him for He cares for you.
So finally I submit to sending Bentley to the local public school and it doesn't even work out! Blah!
So here's what's cool about God and Bentley and Me. God is continually showing me that He is in control of Bentley- perfectly guiding His will for my child's life. I am praying through if God intends for us to keep Bentley home another year. Kristen Selle (who is special ed certified) has offered to work with him one on one 2x a week.
Join us in praying this weekend about preschool (since it starts on Tuesday!) And continue those prayers as we seek the Lord in how to best care for Bentley's education over the course of his life.
I will try to keep you posted.

2.

Bentley has been receiving physical therapy services for about a month at the Detroit Institute for Children (DIC). He has been approved to begin speech and we are waiting to hear back about occupational.
It's interesting because in the DPS school system they didn't see a need for physical or occupational, but at the DIC the therapists have made his needs clear.
He's been receiving the services on our old insurance which I fear we will lose very soon because David has an income and we have new insurance. Our new insurance is in network only and the DIC is probably not considered in network. So you can guess where I am going with this...
I am earnestly praying daily that somehow in some way God is going to work this whole insurance thing out so Bentley can continue to receive the services the DIC has to offer. He is really benefiting from the DIC and I really want to keep him there.
If all goes well, he will be receiving physical therapy once a week for one hour. Speech once a week for a half hour (unless I can get it upped for more) and occupational 2 x a week for 1 hour a session.

3.

As many know, Bentley had a minor surgery scheduled for Monday to open the clogged tear ducts in his eyes. We arrived at the hospital and got all dressed down for surgery- talked to several doctors- the attending anesthesiologist was talking with us when Bentley coughed a very labored mucousy cough. She looked at us and said, "This child is sick and I cannot do surgery. I am sorry." Apparently it is dangerous to put a person under anesthesia with a cold (if you have the choice to wait) and putting a child with Down syndrome under with a cold is even more risky because of his low muscle tone.
Choosing to even do the surgery was a whole process for David and I. We spent most of the weekend in agony over it. David just couldn't decide if he wanted to put Bentley through it- there are severe risks- low risks- but risks. Our friend Matt was over on Saturday and he is an ENT (ears,nose,throat) resident- so his first year is all surgery- It was such a relief to hear from someone who sees several patients a day put under anesthesia... and sees them wake up. He was very comforting. He is going to be a great ENT. :)
So... we decide to go through the surgery and what happens?!!? He can't have it.
At first I was frustrated that it couldn't just be done anyway. But as the day went on I realized that the Lord's Sovereign hand was once again upon our family.


I think God is refining me to trust Him more with my children... especially Bentley. Bentley has so many more needs than Clayton and I go through seasons where it feels like all I am doing is making phone calls and scheduling appointments- These things are good to do, but I have to remind myself that I am not in control of the outcome. I humbly and faithfully am asked to care the needs of my family, but I cannot control the result. This is the reality of every parent. We guide our children in the way of the Lord, but we cannot make them do what we want- and I cannot make others give him what I want him to have.

And so we faithfully do what we can then trust.

How is God refining you?