Bentley and I had such a wonderful time up at SpringHill. For more information you can look at their website
here and to learn more about the special needs inclusion program watch this
video . I mentioned earlier that Bentley and I helped with the special needs counselor training, but then yesterday I was able to be interviewed during the Embrace workshop. The overall mission and desire of SpringHill is to love and embrace all kids- no matter where they're from, if they have special needs, and no matter their nationality or socioeconomic situation.
I always had this opinion that SpringHill was over the top-costs a lot of money- big corporate blah blah... just seemed a like not my style. We do know a lot of previous spring hill counselors for some reason... And as I was talking to the special needs counselors it really hit me... Scott, Kristen, Chris, Leigh, Nate, (all of whom we have lived with at some point) were SpringHill counselors- Then there's a whole additional list of friends we have close relationships with Sarah and Ryan from church, Josh Shoemaker (lived with his brothers), and April were also counselors... It dawned on me that when Bentley was born many of those people were first in line at the hospital to wrap their arms around my son and welcome him into the world- and much of the credit should be awarded to the spring hill special needs inclusion program that allowed them to work with kids with special needs. Naomi spent much of her time yesterday talking about the importance of embracing all people- embracing meaning an action- asking to carry someone's bag, opening a door, starting a conversation- doing something to make others feel welcomed and embraced. When I think about my friends who have been counselors at Springhill I can't help but think about these qualities she wants to instill in her counselors and that my friends also possess these qualities. What a beautiful thing to teach college age students to love and embrace the world- to spend their summers embracing kids.
So the session interview between Naomi and I went well overall, but I do have some major regrets in things I didn't say and I can't seem to let it go... So we talked about the word embrace- which I defined to mean- wrapping your heart, soul, and mind around something- whether it's an idea or a person. To really love people- as they are.
We talked about my vision for my family- which is to be loved by god, love god, and love others. And that my vision doesn't change regarding Bentley because he can do that well.
I talked about our old VDP hippie commune (written about that a lot in this blog) and the wonderful experience that was for me...
We talked about this job the counselors have taken and the great responsibility and privilege to love kids as they are. Talked about how we all have a story to share and to really engage kids to share their story so we can love them more fully.
We talked about Jesus choice of staff: physician, tax collector, fishermen, women, etc... the importance of all jobs and people. I talked about how I don't like to tell people David is a doctor because it changes their perception of our family and I don't think it's a big deal that he is a doctor- or a bigger deal than if he was a teacher or a farmer or a counselor... like he has a gift- the gift of knowledge- and while he has worked extremely hard to strengthen that gift at the end of the day it is a gift and all glory be to God. I used this story to remind us not to look at kids in this way- whether they're athletic, or funny, or talented- but to embrace all kids because they're made in the image of God and that's why we love not because of what we do. I shared 1 Corinthians 1
26 Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. 27 But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. 28 God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, 29 so that no one may boast before him. 30 It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. 31 Therefore, as it is written: “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.”
So there was a section in there where I was supposed to talk about Detroit and stories of how I was embraced in Detroit- and for some reason I blanked. Like I shared these weird random stories, but I didn't share what I had written down. And I am so frustrated with myself. I think a great struggle came forth and I couldn't get passed it... and that struggle is this: Selling our home was the best thing we did for our family- but I struggle greatly with how it effects us in terms of neighboring and being in Detroit. The best place we ever engaged with our neighbors happened organically and it happened in the VDP. That was 3 years ago.... So while we've had these great experiences and opportunities to get to know people and the blessing that is Bentley's school the best memories I have of the kind of life I imagine for our family are three years gone. Of course I remember the challenge that I face now in 3 kids that need my attention- not just delicious food on the table and the company of our neighbors- but real attention- and I've struggled in how to do both... so for now the littles are winning... as they should, right?! I do look forward to re entering the stage of life when we can be more involved in a neighborhood, but while David is super busy and 2 are still home (not for long!) i know this is the best place. For some reason I can't forget and forgive myself for what I didn't say yesterday... guess I'll just say it here and hope that it eases my anxiety. :)
How I've been embraced in Detroit:
When Clayton was born he was an extremely fussy baby. He cried all the time- always wanted to be held. Bentley wasn't walking yet and it was a very difficult and challenging time. My neighbor, Kisha used to come over and say, "where's my baby?" and I'd hand over baby Clayton and she would hold him for hours. I cannot thank her enough for that. Her daughter became our babysitter for years- taking care of the littles and loving them so well.
When the staff team at the Boggs School fully embraced my son into their school- providing for his every need to the best of their ability.
The way Kisha's kids used to meet me at the gate to welcome me home every day during the warm months.
The way Davida used to come over and spend hours and hours just being with me. And the way she used to sleep so sweetly on my couch. :)
The countless people who have smiled at the kids- called Bentley the next Bill Gates, held open doors, carried bags of food to my car, and simply stopped to tell me how precious "the babies" are. :)
I've actually felt extremely embraced by Detroiters. They've been so kind, so helpful, and so encouraging. And I am so thankful to be part of a city that is so rich and diverse.
My hope is to continue to fight against the easy way of life and look for ways to be friendly and embracing and to teach my children how to do this without even thinking about it.
I ended my talk by sharing a quote from Maya Angelou (which I apparently need to say over and over again as I am beating myself up about things left unsaid):
I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
