Let's take a second to read that title again. The idea that children are separated from their parents by prisons should break our hearts. I don't care if their Mama or Daddy did a horrible thing- it should break our hearts to know that children are without a parent. Studies show that it doesn't matter how horrible a parent is to a child- or to society- we inherently want Mom and Dad- and we are broken when they are absent.... no matter the circumstance. So as we learn more about this ministry, may we praise God for what He is doing in this ministry and pray for children who have a parent(s) in prison. Also, know this ministry is aware when a parent is incarcerated for a child- related crime- and obviously a different route is taken with those children. But we can still grieve the loss of the child/parent relationship God intended for us. Amen? Amen. :)
National FACTS:
*In 2007, there were 1.7 million children with a parent in state or federal prison
*Up to 7 million children have a parent in prison, local jails, or on probation/parole
* From 1995-2005 the number of incarcerated women rose 57%, and men rose 34%
Where are the kids?
80-90% live with Mom, if Dad is incarcerated
30% live with Dad if Mom is incarcerated, and 50% will live with a grandmother
*The rest go somewhere else, and 10% are in foster care
South FLORIDA SNAPSHOT:
*15,000 children in MIAMI live with an incarcerated parent
*Another 8,000 in Fort Lauderdale
(23,000total)
*Overwhelmingly are minorities (Black, Hispanic, and Haitian)
THE DEVELOPMENTAL IMPACT OF A CHILD:
* When a parent is arrested the entire family "does time"
*Psychological- fear, trauma, anger, disappointment
*Financial (loss of family income)
*Social (isolation, shame)
*Children of incarcerated parents face:
*Poverty, instability, reduced access to sources of support, anxiety, traumatic stress, embarrassment, and shame.
(Read those words again. We're talking about children. This seriously breaks my heart).
Because of those feelings, children might misbehave:
**Internalized behaviors: anxiety, withdrawal, hyper-vigilance, depression, shame and guilt.
**Externalized behaviors: anger, aggression and hostility to caregivers and siblings.
If MOM is incarcerated:
*Mothers are more likely to have lived with their children than fathers
*Female prisoners serve an average 49 months in state prison and 66 months in federal prison
If DAD is incarcerated:
*When the father is arrested, mothers assume or maintain care giving responsibility 90% of the time
*Men serve an average of 80 months in state prison and 103 months in federal prison.
That's 6-9 years... that's a big chunk of a child's life.
This traumatic experience often pulls the child away from their normal developmental path.
Impact on School Achievement
*Home and school displacements contribute to instability
*Difficult maintaining an academic learning environment
*Less likely to develop meaningful relationships with others thus forming social barriers
Developmental Stages
0-4 years
*Development of trust and attachment for infants 0-2 years old is affected by impaired parent-child bonding
*"Terrible two's"- the sense of independence (saying "No") and initiative ("I can do it myself!") for 2-6 year olds is affected.
5-10 years
*Supposed to develop a sense of accomplishment and ability to work independently, instead it become a period of developmental regressions and poor self concept
*Experience a period of acute traumatic stress reactions, and an impaired ability to overcome future trauma
11-14 years
*Supposed to develop the ability to work productive in groups and to control the expression of emotions
* Instead can be characterized by rejection of limits on behavior and trauma-reactive behaviors
(Kids don't learn to attach to people- they disconnect- and this contributes to the cycle of incarceration-)
15-18 years
*Supposed to become competent as they learn to strike a balance between individualization and a sense of belonging
*Instead, MORE boundary-testing, as impact of parental incarceration tends to lead to the rejection of limit setting by other adults.
Losing Interest in Education
*Adolescent children of incarcerated mothers are 3x more likely than their peers to drop out of high school
*Compared to incarcerated fathers, mothers report that their adolescent children had more trouble with the law as interest in school diminished
What helps to Restore:
*Feeling of being connected to a family structure reduces teh likelihood of the adolescent engaging in deviant behavior
*Kind, stable and supportive care promotes strong connections to school, pro-social peers, and family
THE MINISTRY: SERVICE FOR CHILDREN OF INMATES
*Partnership of 8 agencies
*Geographically dispersed
* Ministry is five years old
So now let's look into what they're doing:
Where they get the children:
-Referrals from parent in prison
-Community events outreach
-Social media, other print/broadcast media stories
-Website, hotline telephone
-Phone calls, letters, and home visits
-Connect to Dept. of Corrections- so the ministry worked for 2 years to get a question on the survey that inmates are given at time of intake that says, "Do you have children? Who do they live with? Can we visit your children and provide services?
I love that last part! They fought and fought to have that question added to the intake form- and it has helped them connect with these kids!
Key principles of the ministry:
1.Child-focused, 2. Include the caregiver and family 3. Re-build the bonds with the incarcerated parent (if possible)
What does that mean?
Child-Focused:
Safety first: food and housing
Meet as many needs as possible: afterschool or tutoring help, mental health counseling, school uniforms, school supplies, and spiritual needs
Provide other support services, when possible: mentoring
Include the Caregiver:
Provide what they initially ask for (remembering our agenda isn't always best)
Build a relationship of trust
Allow them to say no to services
Invite them to new opportunities as they arrive
Coaching caregiver in parental skills
RE-Build the bonds-
*BONDING VISITS: Bus trips to the prison/jail
*structured and unstructured activities for the parents and children to do during the visit (art, lunch, games, etc...) This happens 4 times a year
*parenting tips provided to inmates
*family photo time
*surveys and observations- volunteers are taking notes and watching the interactions between parent and child- this is both for $$ from the gov't to fulfill their data, and for safety reasons, and to encourage those bonds in positive ways
*Provide fun outlet AFTERWORDS for the children- so they usually go out to eat and do something FUN after the visits- because they can be extremely difficult... also, some of the trips drive 5 hours to the prisons- so this is an all day event- and they want to make it fun
*Expression support groups (writing letters to mom/dad, drawing, and pictures
*Video visitation to supplement bonding visits- they have found this to be extremely effective and encouraging, but it took YEARS to get the prisons to allow the video equipment in to make this happen
*Importance of CONTACT time (BEING ABLE TO TOUCH MOM or DAD)
*Normalizes the relationship
*Assured child that parent is safe
*Re-builds the parent/child bond that was broken
*Allows for emotional expression
*Assists with family re-unification in the future
CHALLENGES of the MINISTRY:
*Distances and transportation to facilities $$$$$$
*Caregiver reluctance
*Screening/processing hassles at prison
*Each prison has different leaders and rules
*Parent manipulation
*Transportation to video visitation (usually happens at the churches)
REWARDS
*More than 1,000 children have been FOUND (Often times, when parents are taken into prison/jail, they don't know where the children end up- and more often than not- nobody was keeping track of these kids)
*700 children are receiving coordination services
*50 prison bonding visits in August 2010
*Surveys indicated reduced child aggression\
*Only one child arrested so far- breaking the cycle
*Local and national media attention
So I can't elaborate right now in my own words- but I think you get the idea of what they're doing- I am happy to answer questions too--- or check out their web page!!!
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